Showing posts with label boy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label boy. Show all posts

Friday, 20 June 2014

The good, not so good of parenting- vol 2

Started this earlier this week. Here is a link to the first post.

The good

For the first time, the whole story about his birth. At about 2 am on the 4th of June our son announced his intentions. We went to bed that Monday evening as expectant parents, not too worried, it was going to be another 3 weeks before we would see him. My wife actually still worked on that day and came home at about 6 pm.


Before I really knew what was happening, I was up standing next to her and she said, I "think" my water broke. She went to the bathroom and then came back and by now maybe a little shock or inability to understand, she said, "maybe I just had a big one, not sure". I looked at her and the surroundings and said, "hmm, no, I think your water broke." Here is the thing, at that point we were as calm as could be.


We phoned the doctor, who was asleep, but very understanding and she wanted to shower, so I made some coffee, started my computer, checked if everything was in-place, showered as well and we left for hospital. At this point she started getting contractions and asked me to drive slowly, which I did until we got to the highway, then pushed it to hospital. Still calm, wide-eyed, focused.


When I got to the hospital, I drove to the parking lot, closest to the main entrance and emergency entrance. This is where I cracked for the first time, I could not find the correct parking spot, must have parked 4 or 5 times, then moved parked again, now believe me when I say at 3.30 am the parking lot is empty. Eventually parked and wife got out walking strangely, something like a duck, to the main entrance, I would get the bags and follow.


She was about halfway there when some guy (security) came from nowhere and said no, use the emergency entrance on this side. The poor fellow was half asleep himself, so I had to call the unhappy ducky to this side, and I lost it a second time. Telling this poor guy precisely what I thought. I looked back and went to help my wife, guy was gone, looked down, up, guy back with wheelchair he must have got from the bushes, I never saw any when we arrived.


My wife in wheelchair, we went for the emergency entrance, he pushed, I had the bags. Got there, the poor guy could not get the door open, for a moment I thought he was going to break the glass, he asked me to take the wheelchair, clearly embarrassed, and proceeded to put security pin in, doors opened, no problem. My wife was crying at this point, I thought she was in pain, turns out she was laughing at the whole process happening before her.


So we went to the lift and he took us to the maternity ward, by then I was feeling guilty, and thanked him as I never thanked a person before, hold his hand with both mine. After being put on the monitors to check everything is good with mom and baby, I officially checked us in, and after some more room issues, I was escorted to a locker room to dress for the occasion and met my wife again in the delivery room.


Many asked on the way, have you got a camera and I told them, this is for my wife and I, not the world. I just believe that some things should be engrained in your brain and should only be shared with your partner, our shared personal moment forever, it will never fade.


The good of this story comes now. Our son took his first breath and cried, boy-oh-boy (tear in my eye), you cannot imagine the good in that. It resonates right into your deepest self, you hear it with your whole being, every grain and you feel such love. Amazing experience.


Then the worry starts, everything alright, all in the right place and so forth. I then left the room with our son, while they just made sure all was grand with my wife and we took his weight and length. This picture was taken 15-20 minutes after birth.


IMG00224-20130604-0622After spending some time with him, I left to phone the family, to tell them the news, and here I cracked for the final time, sobbing my way through the story with my parents on the line.


The not so good


Diapers mainly, not all, but while talking about the birth, feeling helplessly incompetent with that first bath. We had a nurse, assigned, to show us the ropes, and when she did it, she worked so rough to my mind with my son, protective instincts being charged 100%, I was blowing a little, but kept it inside. The next day, we had to do it, and fumbled our way through it with the nurse giggling, we felt like, what the hell are we doing with a child. This quickly changed luckily as we got more comfortable with bathing him, so remember, we all have to start somewhere.


Diapers, for the uninitiated, before those first occasions, you do not know how you would handle this part, but luckily a baby being breastfed, has soiled diapers with very little smell. Not an issue and with time diapers become stronger as they start eating, but we can handle this with no issues. It is really not that much of an issue, I promise.


The diapers that does really fall into the not so good category for me is the ones we get when he is getting new teeth. Firstly they are sour more times than not and secondly they cause rash quickly on that delicate bum. Not good for all concerned, enough said.


Wednesday, 28 May 2014

Great Weather Today

Weather tend to rotate between wet, windy and cold in the winter. Today was an exception, milder and windless. Good for a walk. First the morning (5.15am) ritual of deciding what toys to play with - a difficult task.

DSC_0436

At about 9.30 am we took our walk. On the way we met a neighbor who had the same ideas, and boeta and the girl had an impromptu play date.

[caption id="attachment_162" align="aligncenter" width="474"]DSC_0439 Similar in age (10 and 11 months), some baby fun.[/caption]

[caption id="attachment_163" align="aligncenter" width="474"]DSC_0442 Watching the dog together, boeta shoeless already.[/caption]

A little later we were off again. He has had very little interaction with the beach, first too young and then weather or time issues. We do walk early morning 7 am, but not a good time to play.

Today, however, we walked determined to do one thing, get dirty or sandy.

[caption id="attachment_164" align="aligncenter" width="474"]DSC_0478 There you go, now have fun![/caption]

I put him down and stood back! Time to have fun and explore, son!

[caption id="attachment_165" align="aligncenter" width="474"]DSC_0493 Off he went.[/caption]

[caption id="attachment_166" align="aligncenter" width="474"]DSC_0519 Climbing down the "mountain"[/caption]

He did some exploring on the higher level, and then decided to get lower to the water level.

[caption id="attachment_167" align="aligncenter" width="474"]DSC_0547 Bigger rocks here to test.[/caption]

Then he saw a fish in the rock pool and decided to investigate this.

[caption id="attachment_169" align="aligncenter" width="474"]DSC_0579 Fish in the pool.[/caption]

[caption id="attachment_170" align="aligncenter" width="474"]DSC_0620 Slapping water is fun!![/caption]

He realized this is water, like his bath and what do we do, we slap it, fun, lots of fun! Boeta had so much fun that by the time dad decided "the kid" is getting too wet, it was not a happy chappy anymore! "We will be back son", I said, and with that I walked home, fairly briskly, to change what was a sandy, wet boy and although a little sad at the time, he slept like, well like a baby after lunch. If you wondered, I also felt good and full of plans for the rest of the day!

Monday, 26 May 2014

Monday!

[caption id="attachment_148" align="alignright" width="474"]DSC_0392 Ready for a mothers love![/caption]

Mom arrived back from a week's trip!

All the boys were happy to see mom again. The big boy thought: "Tomorrow, I will do a few things."

Monday.

Quote from Eminem: "The truth is you don't know what is going to happen tomorrow. Life is a crazy ride, and nothing is guaranteed."

I woke at 3 am. Wide awake, like I am the one suffering from jet-lag. Not to worry, I will reorganize boeta's playing area, something I do regularly! Had a few coffees, got that done, took me to about 5 am.

I will be good to go, when mom goes off to work at 6.45 am and after finishing with feeding and cleaning the little rascal, we can be off too. Stuff I need to buy. Pulled out the car for mom, walked around it, a nice wet stream of petrol followed me out. DAY BUSTED, energy gone!

So, today, we will work with a Cary Grant quote: "My formula for living is quite simple. I get up in the morning and go to bed at night. In between, I occupy myself as best I can."

Wednesday, 21 May 2014

When Mom is away!

I was thinking today, what is a typical family in this day and age? In my day it would have been dad working and mom staying at home looking after the kids and house. I am fairly certain this is now more a dream to many people and the reality is something totally different.

In our household, this is certainly not the case, in fact it is a total flip of the coin. Mom is the professional, working long hours and traveling extensively, while dad looks after house and kid. Not an easy adjustment initially for all, but once we decided that is how it will have to be, we accepted the fact, and moved on with our life. There is no value in living in the past.

IMG -  (110)So what do we do when mom's away?

I guess the short boring answer is: "We keep going as normal, to make the adjustment as uneventful as possible."

This is the aim and for now, not a lot of things the boys can do to rock the boat, yet! A 11 month baby does not really have the mobility to be able to do anything really mischievous with dad. We can have really messy fun though ....

DSC_0307 DSC_0337 and then we added a few new interesting toys...

DSC_0382and I guess we did not bother too much about when to bath, eat, sleep and all the rest of the boring stuff.

Technology

Another huge difference to my day, is technology and how it has made the world seem not that big anymore. Usually when mom is away, Monday, or rather Sunday night, become a little bit of an issue with Boeta waking at least once and sleeping less peaceful, even during the day. This changes by Tuesday and everything settles down into routine again.

We do however have the technology advantages today with products like Skype, to talk and see one another. This is great for mom, dad and little one. Even at 11 months he recognizes her and she gets lots of screen kisses, he also shows and plays all around the screen (notepad), which I take to the ground level and he has the choice to come and see or play. My wife took these screen pics in Asia and sent it to me.

boeta2 boeta3 botaIn the process we spend nearly 40 minutes playing as a family. As you can see he did enjoy the interaction as well.

It is not easy being alone with a baby, especially as a man, not easy being away, especially as a mom, but it can be done and we try to make it as easy as possible on Boeta, use it as a learning experience and we focus on when we will be together again, rather than the time apart.

Friday, 16 May 2014

Perfect Little Hands

[caption id="attachment_80" align="alignnone" width="474"]AJ, 2 weeks old Boeta, 2 weeks old[/caption]

I find the development of Boeta a wonderful experience to watch and be part of. Initially those little hands remain clenched in little fists. As many photographs depict they do have a nice grip if you put your finger in there, a type of reflex, but they are not able to actively reach and grip - this is part of future discovery!

At around 8 weeks or so those hands begin to open and initially Boeta looked like a boxer in exercise, batting at the dangling playthings. A few weeks later I was lucky enough to be making a video, when he grasped the same playthings for the first time, slowly closing the hand around the toy and yes pulling it straight to the mouth, another big moment in Boeta's life and those little hands.

[caption id="attachment_91" align="alignnone" width="222"]AJ nearly 3 months. Boeta nearly 3 months.[/caption]

From there it was shaking of things and then he transferred toys from hand to hand. Tummy time also became more interesting as he started exploring his immediate surroundings and the materials he was placed on, with the fingers, picking up and testing with the mouth. This puts a whole new strain on Mom and Dad, making sure nothing harmful is in range. By this time hair pulling or grabbing is fun, less so for dad, but funny non-the-less.

[caption id="attachment_88" align="alignnone" width="468"]AJ's tummy time on deck. Boeta's tummy time on deck.[/caption]

The "pincer grasp", picks small things up with thumb and forefinger, seems to start from around 7-8 months and from there on he works on perfecting this over the next months. He also got stronger and lifted himself up on the still closed hands.

[caption id="attachment_87" align="alignnone" width="470"]AJ working hard and started pulling faces too! Boeta working hard and started pulling faces too![/caption]

By around 8 months he was on all four's and starting to prepare for crawling, but only one hand seemed to be open and we played slapping games to make him comfortable with both hands being open in that position.

Interesting enough, he started crawling only once he learned to open both hands on the floor and lifting himself. That first crawl has evolved with various speeds too, slow, mid and race, which is pretty fast.

At 9 months, maybe a little later, he started trying to page through the thick paged baby books. He loves his books and spends lots of time with them in a day.

[caption id="attachment_82" align="alignnone" width="488"]AJ preparing to crawl, one hand open in position. Boeta preparing to crawl, one hand open in position.[/caption]

At this point it is important to note that I played various games and did regular baby exercises with him throughout the preceding months. One Friday afternoon, it all clicked and off he went.

[caption id="attachment_83" align="alignnone" width="475"]AJ  tearing down the hallway, 10 months Boeta tearing down the hallway, 10 months[/caption]

By 11 months he is also trying to feed himself with some help, it is said some begin earlier, and maybe we did not attempt this earlier to know, but he is trying it now. He is forever taking toys and turning them around (upside down) and investigating, it seems, how it is put together or works.

[caption id="attachment_89" align="alignnone" width="479"]Investigating a toy! Investigating a toy![/caption]

That is where we are, keeping an eye on those hands, because they are forever looking for new things to get hold and investigate. Being low to the ground those hands can put you in a "spot" when with friends, because he quickly finds anything "normally not seen" in visits. He also quickly points out the "stuff" that should be put away!

[caption id="attachment_84" align="alignnone" width="540"]A favorite book with sliding windows A favorite book with sliding windows[/caption]

He loves playing games with knock the soccer ball and chase it, a firm favorite, hide and seek and dad cannot catch me, I am too fast being other much-loved games. Over the past weeks he started throwing things he picked up, still funny at the moment.

[caption id="attachment_85" align="alignnone" width="497"]Gripping a ball, which has now evolved to try and throw it! Gripping a ball, which has now evolved to try to throw it![/caption]

While we are having fun playing, it has become apparent that the little joker has more and more interest in walking, standing alone for longer and longer, walking around while holding on to things....and grabbing at anything he sees in the new height.

[caption id="attachment_90" align="alignnone" width="496"]AJ is amused by his radio controlled car! Boeta is amused by his radio controlled car![/caption]

Finally as a father and not expert, above is a summary of my experiences with Boeta, a unique individual, which is true of every baby and toddler. I use child development guidelines as just that, guidelines, because every baby is different and every household equally so. In some cases he is quicker in mastering and some a little later. Importantly, he is a healthy little boy with barely any issues so far (little constipation a few months back).

[caption id="attachment_86" align="alignnone" width="459"]Eating a rice cake! Eating a rice cake![/caption]

Little Hands

My little hands play patty-cake
They peek-a-boo and wave . . .
They catch me while I learn to walk
And splash me as I bathe . . .

My little hands reach up to you
For hugs before I sleep . . .
And fold together when I pray
The Lord my soul to keep . . .

My little hands are tiny now
But yours will serve to guide me . . .
And when I'm grown I'll still reach out
And know you're right beside me.

Author unknown

Friday, 9 May 2014

Let's explore this plant today!

https://flic.kr/p/ngi3Cx

This one is called Aloe schelpei. It is a succulent plant, which means it stores water in its leaves or roots. Its home is Ethiopia, a country in Africa, where it grows on slopes of mountains at 2100 + meter. (That is high!)

https://flic.kr/p/nxMM7z

The leaves are blueish green, see, and look at the nice reddish color on the leaves margins, but be careful, there is also teeth, they help protect the plant.

https://flic.kr/p/ngiezd

Look at all the flowers! Wow, you know they have a name for all those flowers together, it is called a raceme, and as each flower becomes older they get yellow edges. Let me show you!

https://flic.kr/p/ejKHJ1

We will visit more of dad's Aloe plants soon, and then you can see all the different types. Let's go in, then I will show you where Ethiopia is, this plant is far away from its home, here in our garden.